By: AMA Member Arsham Mirshah

The 5 Golden Rules of Networking… AND Social Media!

What do Social Media and Networking have in common? It might be obvious, but they both depend heavily on your ability to deal with people (or be social).

PS: Have you read How To Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie? – Highly recommended if you’re a human.

OK – so you want to engage in social media or you want to be a successful networker to make connections, develop business, improve customer service, and at the end of the day, make more money.

I understand.

Use these 5 golden rules of Networking / Social Media ONLY if you want to be successful…

Rule #1: Jump into a conversation.

Imagine you just walked into a networking event where people are talking in their groups of 2 or 3. You look awkward not talking to anyone, so what do you do?

Jump in the conversation.

That’s right, go right up to a group and interrupt them.

HOLD ON! – Do it politely of course! Say things like:

“Hi, sorry everyone, could I join you?”
“So sorry to interrupt, my name is ________.”
“HEY, how’s it going y’all!”

(That last one was just for fun, but if that’s the vibe you get, use it!)

How to apply this in social media…

The same goes for social media. If there a blog posts with several comments or a forum post that you haven’t posted on yet, there is NO OTHER WAY than to just hop right in there and join the conversation.

Just do it tactfully, that’s all.

Rule #2: Be genuinely interested in the other person.

This comes directly from the book mentioned in the beginning of this article: “How To Win Friends & Influence People” (aka, “HTWF” – required reading @WebMechanix).

Admit it: it’s impossible to dislike a person who has taken a genuine interest in you. And when somebody has a genuine interest in you, you tend to be more interested in them.

IMPORTANT: You must ACTUALLY be interested… no acting allowed. Why? – Because shameless flattery has the exact opposite effect.

How to apply this in social media…

In social media, read other people’s comments before leaving your own. Often times you’ll find someone who you agree with. Follow that person and see if you can build a genuine [digital] friendship.

Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s WHO you know!

Rule #3: Don’t forget to SMILE!

Who doesn’t like a smile?

It’s hard to be mad at someone that’s grinning from ear to ear.

When you smile, you send a subconscious signal that you’re happy, healthy & successful. This will naturally attract other happy, healthy & successful to you.

The best part: it’s really easy to do, gives you a leg up and it’s FREE! Smiling is the definition of a “no brainer”!

How to apply this in social media…

“But you can’t smile through the computer.” – I beg the differ: (:

Be happy when you use social media. Take a picture of yourself smiling and link to it in your tweet or comment. Smile!

Rule #4: Understand the other person’s interest in you.

Remember your goal: You want to find valuable people to add to your Rolodex, be those mentors, employees, customers, or partners.

Not to be rude, but you don’t want to waste your time talking to someone who doesn’t fit the bill. It’s like being a tennis player and purposefully hanging out with a bunch of tennis haters – it just doesn’t make sense.

That said, you might want to try asking people (candidly & tactfully, of course) whether they would be interested in your product or service.

It can be awkward and scary, but it’s an honest question and rarely brings any harm (can you think of a situation where it would bring harm.. I’m having trouble doing so).

How to apply this in social media…

Tailor your message: Remember your goal and focus your energy on the type of person who can help you achieve that goal. There are customers, colleagues, partners, friends, family, employees, bosses, etc.. and your message varies on who you’re talking to.
Take the conversation private or offline: After building some rapport in a social or public setting, move the conversations to the next level with a direct message, email or even a phone call.

Remember to be candid, open, direct, honest and tactful when dealing with people, digitally as well as in person.

Rule #5: Perfect your pitch.

Say you’re doing a fantastic job jumping in the conversation, being genuinely interested in others, smiling and finding others starting to take interest in you… that’s GREAT – Mission accomplished!

Well, not yet. At this point, they’re likely to ask, “What is it that you do?”

That’s your queue to deliver your “30-second pitch,” or “elevator speech,” or “value proposition,” or whatever they’re calling it these days.

Practice makes perfect. You need to prepare this, practice it in the mirror and be confident in your mission, values and purpose.

Once you have it memorized stone cold or verbatim, you can easily adjust it on the fly based on who you’re talking to.

For example, you’re in healthcare and so is the person you’re talking to. They get your lingo and understand industry specific acronyms, so you can easily speak their language.

But say you’re talking to somebody in a totally different industry like technology. You’ll need to lay off the healthcare jargon and use layman’s terms to gauge their level of knowledge and ensure they understand.

If you deliver your pitch and see people are like, “Oooh, that sounds interesting!” you’re doing good; if you’re getting a lot of blank stares, not so good.

How to apply this in social media…

Some say “pitching” is taboo when it comes to social media. I say nonsense.

As mentioned in Rule #4, first build rapport publicly, then take the conversation to a private setting and tailor your pitch to your audience.

Social media & networking can be fun, but remember you have a goal. There is nothing wrong with having a goal and in fact, if you’re not goal-oriented, and you’re not gaining any tangible results from your social media efforts, you may find the plug being pulled on the budget soon :/

OK – You’re ready to get your butt out there and CONNECT!

Put these 5 golden rules of networking and put them in your arsenal. If you’re the digital type, use these rules when you engage in social media!

Remember, knowledge might be power but it’s worthless without action.

About the author

Arsham Mirshah is co-founder of WebMechanix, a digital advertising agency with a focus on SEO/SEM. Arsham finds himself networking, tweeting and commenting on a daily basis and has found these 5 rules hold true in every conversation.

For more about Arsham, check out Arsham’s Google+ Profile.